Tuesday, May 12, 2009

A Fine Kettle of Fish

The lilacs are blooming and my allergies are going crazy. I'm waiting for my medicine to kick in but until then my face is going to feel like it's in a meat grinder. Ah, glorious spring.

On Friday morning I was going to tell you about my cat, Sabrina, and how after having her all of my adult life I had to put her down. Peter brought her in for me, since I really didn't have the strength to do it myself. I feel like such a coward but I'm so glad he took the burden from me. I wish we had gone together, but I took the kids out to the garage sales (with a very distracting Grandpa) so they wouldn't have an overly dramatic "Good-Bye Ceremony" to make it more difficult than it had to be. We decided to lie to the children about what was happening to her. Judge me if you will, but I just wasn't up to dealing with the whole 'the cat is dead' issue. And at 3 and 5 years old, I felt there was limited merit in going through the ordeal of losing a pet. I know that having a pet die can be very instructive (I lived on a farm growing up--I know whereof I speak), but I also felt like they were too young to gain much benefit.

Before we realized she was so ill we were going to give her to my mom's old co-worker who had lost his cat in an apartment fire. We had told the kids that this was going to happen and how good it would be to give him Sabrina for company. So we just stuck with this story. I was hoping that doing something good for someone else would help cushion the blow. I'm not used to telling fibs so this was perhaps harder on me in that respect, but it was better to deal with my own sadness and not have to manage theirs as well.

On Saturday I was going to tell you about how we went to Shepherd's Harvest Sheep and Wool Festival. It's the first year that I've remembered to go and we got to go with my sister in law Rachel and her husband Chris. It was so. much. fun. We saw a merino sheep (ugly beyond recognition as a sheep), goats, alpacas and llamas, and angora rabbits the size of pillows. The kids had a good time and Rachel and I had a great time. I saw yarn that was more amazing than any I'd ever seen before. I spent too much money. Best Mother's Day ever. It was a Mother's Day extravaganza.

On Sunday I was going to tell you about Henry's baptism. He just fit into the baptismal gown worn by his great-grandfather in 1915, his grandfather, his father and his brother. In another month he would have been too big. He laughed when the water was poured over his head and he drooled all over his gown. By the end of the service he looked like he'd had an immersion baptism. We had a nice dinner at my parents' house after and it was a good day.

But Monday came and now most of the weekend doesn't seem as important as it might have been. There aren't too many details that I'm willing to share because I don't want to tell too much of someone else's story. We have a close family member who is very sick. It will mean a long hospital stay and an unpleasant treatment. We are all very worried, of course, but most of all we're just so sad that this person whom we love most of all will have to go through this trial. One can always help and try to be useful. One can try to ease the burden. But sadly, no one can go through it for him. We can only go with. So, we'll be praying for strength and health and leaving it to God to do the rest.

You know, I'd give a whole lot to have a dull year. I'm going to keep my fingers crossed for 2010.

2 comments:

Knittymama said...

I'm so sorry to see you're going through a lot too. I didn't go in when we had to put Gracie to sleep a coupe of weeks ago, I just couldn't deal with it either.

Sending wishes of health to your family member...and I'm with you on the whole "2010 better be better than 2009" thing!

Anonymous said...

Sarah I came across your blog by accident and have spent several hours (don't tell my boss!) reading the entire thing!

I would just like to say that you have a beautiful family and I have really enjoyed seeing them grow in your pages.

Thank you for brightening my day - I shall look in on you regularly from now on to see how you are all doing;

Lesley-Ann - England