Thursday, January 22, 2009


If you look closely, you can see it. It's her brother's handiwork. Or shovelwork, as the case may be. It's her first black eye.

It doesn't look like much now, especially in a picture, but last night there was quite a bit of swelling. What I would like to know is how you "accidentally" whack someone in the face with a snow shovel. Wait--I don't think I want to know.

We took his word for it--it was an accident--but it will still be a very, very long time before the shovels are played with again.

Anna got plenty of attention, and some Motrin. She bounced back quickly, as she usually does. Little trooper. And I told her the story of MY first black eye, which she loved. Poor little bunny. She has no idea that today she looks like a prize fighter who didn't bring home the prize!

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Winter is Not for Sissies

We've been enjoying cold winter temperatures here in the midwest. It's the kind of cold that freezes your eyelids in place when you go out to get the mail. Luckily, Henry has been totally warm. Whenever he leaves the house, he's wearing this soft, soft sweater.

You'll remember back in July when I was admitted to the hospital Allison from Pretending Sanity sent me a lovely care package of yarn and a pattern. It kept me busy during many long hours as I sat in bed, looking out the window at downtown St. Paul. I was so thankful for that act of kindness. It kept me positive, doing something with my hands as I hoped for a healthy baby to wear this little sweater.

Happy day, indeed!

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Happy New Year and Pass the Denture Adhesive

It's a new year, as you know, and I have to say that I've never been so glad to wave good-bye to an old year as I was this time around. 2008 kicked me in the mouth and handed me my teeth in a cup. All I can say is good riddance. I spent the second half of the year in the hospital, either in a bed myself or next to an isolette. I bounce back from a lot of things pretty quickly, but I confess that this has left me reeling.

It is hard to explain concisely, in writing, how I feel about what happened this summer. It's the sort of thing that takes an evening, over coffee, with many, many words to talk about. It's the kind of thing that only your best friends will patiently hear.

After some time, I'm sure I'll be fine again. In in middle of all of it, though, I suppose I just feel very lucky. I don't know why such frightening and difficult things should happen to me and I don't know why I should be so lucky as to be spared the worst of it. I went into the hospital in July thinking that I was going to loose my baby. Instead, by a miracle I can't explain, this baby held on for an amazing six and a half weeks and lived. It wasn't a nice way to have a baby, but I think I'll take what I get and be happy.

There were many moms on my unit in the hospital who weren't so fortunate. I don't know why I was spared that grief. After looking that loss full in the face, I can still barely catch my breath. It's like being snatched back to the sidewalk after stepping in front of a speeding truck. Call me a coward if you like, but I don't think I'll try it again.

This past year tried my limits and pushed me to the edge. I want to settle back into peace again and feel only the gratitude that comes with mercy. It will take time. I know that there are things you cannot rush and that it is God who brings healing. I'm so thankful to have these little smiles to help.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Photo of the Day

I am so embarrassed over how long it has been since I've last posted. I can only blame the baby, so I won't blame anyone at all. However, a quick update on Time-Eating Baby will show that he is now 11 lbs 5 oz. He is three times his birth weight. Can you believe it?

I'm working on a post for the Year in Review. It'll be the next big post, but it's taking some time to work on. There's a fine balance to be struck when writing about highly charged things. I want to talk about how this last year effected me, but I don't want this blog to be an emotional Kleenex, either. I have friends for that sort of thing.

In the meantime, here's a picture of Anna. She was playing Pirate and dug up this old clip-on tie that was in Thomas's room. She proudly clipped it on and said she was "just like Daddy"! That's true. Or it would be, if Daddy were a pirate.