Who knew that pink could be such a frightening color?
Yesterday afternoon my body started producing some pinkness along with my typical fluid "output" and the result was understandably alarming. I was as worried and scared as I've been since this whole thing began. My nurse didn't seem too concerned about it, but there isn't much in the way of reassuring news to be had in this situation. I called Peter to let him know about the change and I thought of calling my friend, but didn't want to cry on the phone. As long as everything stays the same with my condition, I'm mostly fine, but any change brings the uncertainty and risk of the situation to the surface and I end up a mass of nerves. It's cruelly unfair that even at a time like this, I am still not permitted a glass of whiskey.
One of my super-specialist doctors came on his rounds this morning and was very reassuring. I could continue to spot like this throughout the rest of my pregnancy and that it has a lot to do with having low fluid levels. Apparently amniotic fluid, among many other things, keeps your uterus from getting irritated and scuffed up by your big, wiggly baby. When you don't have much, well, irritation and scuffing ensues. It has nothing to do with how well the pregnancy is going--high-risk factors aside. Of course, it can mean that your cervix is dilating and that you are going into labor, but my lack of regular contractions suggests that this is not the case. I stand reassured.
It is amazing to me how some people have this natural ability to reassure, comfort, and encourage and others, no matter how well intentioned, simply do not. It is a gift, and I'm glad to see it's not as rare as I once thought.